Y Is For Yabbering You
What bullshit do you tell yourself?
Many people have minds that yabber – often constantly about real life things. What will you have for dinner? Is there enough petrol in the car? What time is that meeting?… stilling that kind of yabbering on when meditating can start to come easily with practice.
But what about the negative self-talk, and the reasons and excuses you tell yourself for not making changes, or addressing problems you’re encountering in life. How easy do you find it to recognise the bullshit you are telling yourself, and to sit with it long enough to enable you to challenge it for what it is?
What is this yabbering?
In simple terms it is you excusing to others (and yourself!) not taking on challenges or tasks that for one reason or another you haven’t faced. Fear is the number one factor behind this ~ fear of what only you can tell, and quite often you won’t know at the outset.
Examples of people’s yabbering you voice I’ve heard just this week include
- I haven’t told the doctor because…
- I can’t lose weight at the moment as…
- I need to be free of the stress in my life before I…
- I won’t commit yet in case…
- I’m not scared but…
Sadly, the reality is, if we sit in this bullshit for too long it seeps out into other areas of our lives. Impacting on our health, our relationships, and our overall happiness – these excuses are actually excuses to be sad.
It happens to the best of us
I have a good friend who works in the personal development world – they’ve currently got themselves in a bit of a pickle. And the thing about pickles is they often take time, energy, and commitment to get out of.
We all have the tools to get ourselves out of pickles, people working in personal development should know how to use those tools too… but sometimes putting that into practice can be scary, even feel impossible! So we let our yabbering inner self tell us all the excuses and bullshit we can to get ourselves out of facing our pickles head on.
And so starts the spiral of negativity and poor decisions that only serve to percolate the pickle.
Getting out of the pickle can sometimes be easier than we think, and sometimes be a huge uphill struggle, but it’s always worth it.
How to hush the yabbering you
First and foremost you have to hear the yabbering you for what it truly is, and this is where your mindfulness practice can play a big part.
If there’s something you’d like to achieve, or overcome, but are not getting on top of, take time to sit with that. Invite yourself to tell yourself the reasons why (just like you would tell anyone else). Now let those reasons just be in the same space as you – what do you feel?
Remember that Mindfulness is all about paying attention without judgement, you don’t need to admonish yourself if it slowly dawns on you that those reasons are actually just excuses. You don’t need to make up excuses for your excuses either!
Recognising the yabbering you as nothing more than a bullshitter is often the biggest, and most challenging part of this journey ~ once you see it for what it is you can start to make a plan of how you will overcome that. Remember to allow yourself to take tiny steps if you need to, and to draw on the support of those who care about you.
Please do give this post a share to help out others who might be in a pickle right now
If you’d like to know more about how Mindfulness could help you with your day-to-day challenges you can sign up for a space at our freely given webinar here ~ see you there!